Conversations that Matter

Conversations that Matter

Several leaders that I am currently coaching have asked questions about how they can keep their team members engaged and motivated along with creating buy-in to what the team is trying to achieve.

The questions have come from leaders who have been promoted and are now looking after new teams and those whose ways of work have changed yet again - so that's the working from home, remote workers, and changes in office location when everyone can be in the same place at the same time. You may have some other reasons why this might be a question you want answered.

What I have noticed is that in this time of what I can only describe as extreme busyness, everyone tends to jump straight to solution mode. I see a lot of leaders who feel they have to have the answers to these questions and potential solutions they can tell their team members about so everyone can move on quickly and see some progress.

There seems to be a lot of 'telling' and not a lot of 'asking'.

Because our brains are so full and we are often after quick results, and we seem to forget about the simple art of conversation. Leaders also seem to have taken on the sole responsibility of solving these issues for their team members.

But what if leaders weren't the ones to solve this potential problem?

Bear with me for a moment because I wonder if we could all benefit from looking at this from a different perspective.

What if we went into these conversations with the sole purpose of helping our team members work through this issue by 'asking' them some really good questions instead of 'telling' them what we think they should do?

I reckon this approach is going to get a way better result.  And we know this, we have just got caught up in the busyness of things.

So what do we need, as leaders, to make this a really useful conversation for our team members?

We need to have regular 1:1's with each of our team members so we aren't making assumptions about what we think might be going on, and we want to ask great questions.  We also want to make sure that we really listen to what our people are telling us.  It was Stephen Covey who said, "The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply".  We want to make sure we have allocated time for these conversations and to make sure we are fully present when we have them.

When we have conversations from this place, we are by default, building trust with each team member.  It's like a puzzle where each question unlocks a piece of the solution.  It lets them know that we are genuinely interested in what is going on for them and what challenges they think they are having. It lets them know we care about how they are doing and that we want them to be successful. If we rush in with a solution, we may not be solving the problem they think they have. When this happens, team members tend to switch off and not pay any attention to what we are saying as our words can often appear irrelevant to them.

So, some useful questions to ask team members who are juggling different ways of work and different locations could be:

1. How are you finding the current ways of work we are using (working from home; remote working; finding common times to all be in the office as a team)?

2. What would you say is your biggest challenge with our ways of working?

3. What works well for you with our current ways of working?

4. Which environment helps you be: more creative; more productive; and more focused for deep work?

5. How do you find switching between the different work venues you are currently using?

6. Do you know how your work contributes to helping us achieve our team goals?

7. Is there anything you need from me to help you with our way of work?

You may also have other specific questions you would like to ask but the general idea is we want to understand how each team member is navigating this ever-changing landscape that is often sold as 'flexible working'.

Not everyone adapts to change in the same way - some can be quite agile with change, while others would prefer more certainty and stability.  As a leader, it's our job to know this about each of our people so we can reduce any anxiety our flexible ways of working may be creating for them.

So don't be afraid to have the conversations that matter and just know, you don't need to go in with the solution. It may be far more beneficial to go into the conversation with a clear purpose and outcome for the discussion, along with some really good questions that will help you fully understand where your team members are at and what they are currently experiencing.  From there, you can help your team members navigate a great solution for themselves.

Need some help?

If you would like some help to create better connections and conversations with your team members or to identify how your team is performing against the components of a high-performance team, email or give me a call, details are below.